Sunday, July 26, 2009

Belief

Belief. As a word in and of itself, it's one of the more powerful. It has launched battles, inspired great art, torn close families apart, and so on. But although we may dwell upon the details of our beliefs, the very concept of belief is often overlooked. Everybody believes something, though some think that they believe nothing at all. The band Rush once sang, "If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice." But why do we choose to believe or doubt? Let's take a look…

We either believe or doubt something based upon our own empirical experiences. So truth is built upon truth and experience. Doubts are those ideas that are filtered out of the truth column. But we believe what seems reasonable, based upon our previous experiences, and the consideration of the alleged facts presented. Some require little to convince, others a bit more, others still require tremendous amounts, and some are impossible to convince. No matter what the data presented, sadly, some will never let go of a belief that they feel more "comfortable" with. An example:

Person a: Do you believe that China exists?

Person b: Yes.

Person a: How do you know?

Person b: I've seen pictures.

Person a: They're fakes!

Person b: I've met people from China.

Person a: They're lying!

Person b: I've flown there myself!

Person a: while your plane was in the air, they set up a fake scenario on the ground. You circled in the air for an hour, landed, and they tricked you!

For each individual, there comes a point where the evidence presented, along with their own personal experience, tells them either to believe or not to believe. For many it seems, it is a source of constant frustration to have someone else believe something that they feel differently about. Often, we perceive an attack on our beliefs as an attack upon ourselves; that if our theology or philosophy is somehow flawed, then our justification as a person is threatened. While this thinking is clearly misguided, the wise person recognizes this aspect and modifies their actions accordingly. If I am ever to convince you of the things I feel are true; if you are ever to convince me, we must lower the ego and accept that others may indeed be as bright as ourselves, that questioning my beliefs does not challenge me as a person, that I CAN change my position based upon additional evidences, and that other's are more easily won over through a sense of mutual respect than by aggressive words.

I do not subscribe to the "birther" movement, but respect their concerns, give validity to the idea of requiring a certificate in the future (there is no legal requirement to present said documents), and respect their right to question what I already accept as fact. A case in point: I do not feel that it's fair to put an excessive burden on the wealthy for health insurance, yet recognize a need to solve a desperate problem, and hope that over the long haul we'll come up with a fair but functional system – we're Americans, damn it. Others have done it; we can too. We went to the moon with the computing power of a modern digital watch or two; this should be easy.

In closing, I preach to you to hold solid to those beliefs that you're certain of, be open-minded and well informed without bias, and respect each other and their opinions. Insulting people for thinking differently only incites similar activity, and produces nothing of worth. No matter how hard we try, we all succumb to the perceived attacks, intentional or not, when our beliefs are insulted. Still, we should try, both to be forgiving, and to not be offensive. This is the American way, my friends. Everybody gets a voice. But use wisdom in speaking, and use the ears too.

John

Saturday, July 25, 2009

The Charlie Brown Postulate



Metaphysics and theology in general are intrinsic. But too often these weighty subjects are difficult to comprehend to the average man. I do not blame Mr. Average for this separation of knowledge, but instead blame the more intellectual, who can conceive such lofty notions but cannot translate these ideas into words that others can understand. In my simple mind, I always think of things in terms of something else – a comparison, maybe. But I always strive to reduce things into their simplest terms, so that I can use the knowledge in the widest range of interests. Real truth is often simple in nature. There is a lot of difficulty in conceiving the nature of a God and it's potential relationship to living creatures of this God's creation. I may have something that, although perhaps not unique in my thinking, may assist some in these matters.

For this exercise, we make the presumption that Charlie Brown, and all of the Peanuts characters, are actually living, sentient beings (such as ourselves). We also make the assumption that the Peanuts and their world are truly two-dimensional – they are actually three-dimensional representations of two-dimensional creatures and places, but for this exorcise, we'll allow they deception to be real.

In the Charlie Brown Postulate, Charlie Brown, all of the Peanuts characters, and the entire universe that they exist in are the sole creation of Charles Shultz. He (Charles Shultz) is the God of the Peanuts. He created every one of them, knows every hair on each of their heads, controls their world, even time itself! He can destroy them with the swipe of His mighty hand, or grant them everlasting life. But Charles can never physically enter into the two-dimensional world of the Peanuts, though He could create a representation of Himself and inject this being into the world of the Peanuts to represent His will. Try as they might, no Peanut can ever truly understand Charles, nor can they conceive the parents of Charles. Now, the comparisons with our modern world may begin.

This can easily be shown to support parts of many modern religions in some capacity or another, including even the agnostic with their doubts of our ability to understand a God and it's ways. Polytheists simply suggest a team effort as opposed to the singular Charles. Even the atheist can be encompassed in this theology, if someday science and knowledge expands to embrace these things, through continued discovery and revelations of the workings, or the mechanics, of the universe. Then again, it may show me to be a fool. Time will tell (maybe).

Keep thinking, and assume nothing without the recognition that it is indeed an assumption..

John

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Healthcare

Could there be a hotter topic these days? There's a lot of information out there, along with a lot of misinformation, and some pretty scary stories. But this is America; you know the ending CAN be a happy one.

The nightmares of health insurance operating unregulated are quite familiar to me, as I suffer from a couple of chronic conditions, and generally, my health is poor, especially as I get older. I have seen my diabetes used as an excuse to refuse me auto insurance, life insurance (OK, I understand that one) and health insurance. I saw my employer's health plan changed to exclusively refuse me and me alone, out of a company of nearly one hundred. As if life isn't difficult enough simply trying to survive these conditions, and all of the other distractions of life, I must do battle with insurance companies who put dollars before treatment. I've been told by my HMO doctor to test my blood sugar levels seven times a day, but my HMO pharmacy would only provide enough test strips for three tests a day. And yet, my experiences are minor; a friend was delayed long enough to die before receiving life saving treatment. This is all too common, and only seems to sink in with those whom it strikes.

Though a liberal, I think it very unfair to require the rich to pay for all of my health insurance, while asking nothing of myself. I'm an American, and can and will make sacrifices for what I believe in. I can afford twenty-five cents per can of soda to help pay for healthcare, though I drink around a six-pack of soda a day (diet). I'd even pay twice that much! And I'm poor. It may not be as large a contribution as the wealthy may end up paying, but I'll do what I can to help. What is the answer to our health care needs? Insurance performs no actual function, aside from denying service. Insurance is a HUGE waste of money, with no actual product or service (you can find a doctor without their help, right?). So forgive me for having absolutely no sympathy for the insurance industry – they can collapse and regroup into some other field, imho. Either we need to severely regulate the industry, which has demonstrated a propensity for unethical and abusive behavior, or we need a public option to give people a choice, thus forcing the insurance companies to modify their product to remain competitive. We need change, and something drastic seems in order at this point. The healthcare industry is bribing – I mean, lobbying – congress to the tune of one point three million dollars per day right now. How do we create change with resistance like that?

We've known that we, as Americans, have been sadly behind the rest of the developed world in providing this basic function to our population. Many other countries even provide it to foreigners. Sadly, we wait until the problem is so big that it's about to bankrupt our nation, then we act. Kinda like our response to global warming and conservation in general – wait until the eleventh hour. We don't have to become like Canada, or England, or France, or Germany, or Cuba, or any of those other countries that are so successful in this capacity, but we DO need to adopt something that works. In all sincerity, I say that if you do not like the public option, and I can understand concerns over it, then please show us a smart alternative, and do it quickly. We have no more patience for this agony. Too many have suffered and/or died, needlessly, over corporate greed. If you have an idea, bring it forth, or support something that is better than the failure we have today.

And one last note: I loved my healthcare HMO, too, until they were required to spend some money on a surgery. My doctor, a member of Kaiser, told me I had a work related injury, and that Kaiser would not cover it, as such. In California, Kaiser is the carrier for my employer's Workman's Compensation. I went to see the worker's comp doctor, in the same Kaiser building, two doors down from my doctor. He insisted I had no injury, and refused to treat me. Thus began a five-year journey through hell. My employer was allowed to punish me for being injured at work by canceling my Kaiser, thus ruining my health even further. This eventually led to my losing my eyesight (it's nearly gone now), and a host of other complications due to a lack of basic health care for chronic illness. And do NOT think that if you walk into a hospital, they have to treat you (I had a doctor tell me this once). I absolutely know better – all they have to do by law is stabilize you – if you aren't about to die, you're outta luck. This system simply does not work. I earn a lower wage so that my employer can afford to pay worker's comp insurance to cover me (he doesn't eat bread and water so that I can have worker's comp insurance), but because his name is on the check to the insurance company every month, they only listen to him, though I'm the one they're supposed to be concerned with. I am NOT a concern to them, though the state worker's comp law requires that I am. Again; this simply does not work. Had I gotten treatment in a timely manner, today I'd be back to paying taxes, not living out my last years at the tax payer's expense. May no one reading this EVER have to ride this horse. Call your representatives; make sure of it.

John

Friday, July 17, 2009

Diabetes 101


Though I am new to this particular blogging site, and have only provided my new audience with a small taste of what's to come, already I've had need of time away. I'm a type 1 (juvenile) diabetic, of about forty years now. This has cost me my sight in one eye, and threatens the other. There are things that I have thought upon many times in my life, I have learned things about, and have my own observations of. If for no other reason than simply to survive, I've studied diabetes of most types for a long, long time. Let me educate you on these various conditions known as "diabetes", maybe dispel some myths, and share what I've found to be true. The very fact that I can type at all right now is due to a very large monitor, Mac intelligence, a slight remission from the bleeding in my eyes and a large print keyboard. So – welcome to my world. Let's go.

Diabetes, being used as a generic term, is the inability to process glucose (sugar), the body's fuel. There are generally two reasons for this: either insulin resistance, or low (or no) insulin production. But understanding the basic function of insulin is necessary here. Imagine the cells of your body as houses – different kinds of cells means different kinds of houses, but in both cases, each have some common needs and attributes. The fuel that runs your house is glucose. The veins and arteries are the roads for delivery of fuel and other goods, which the houses must have to operate. Insulin is the key that unlocks the fuel door, similar to the one on your car. So imagine – you run out of fuel for your house, the fuel is brought to you via the roadways, but you lost the key to open the fuel lock! Your home runs out of fuel (dies) and the infrastructure must deal with the excess fuel clogging the roadway. This is, of course, a very simplistic rendering and hardly exhaustive. For instance: there is a phenomenon known as "caramelization". This is the effect of combining heat, oxygen, sugar and time. If any of the components in this formula are increased, you see the effect more rapidly. For instance: take whipped cream and apply a flame – instant caramelization (the browning of the surface). This condition occurs to our internal organs, too. So if I ran an incredible temperature, or had more sugar in my blood stream (which I do) then the process of "browning" occurs faster – artificial aging, if you will. And obviously, increased time increases the effects. Less oxygen would seem to help, but upon further consideration, seems to be a poor idea. Antioxidants do help though. But this browning is lethal.

Now I want to focus on a particular type of diabetes – what used to be called juvenile diabetes, because the majority of the victims are children when it is first contracted. Today it's known as type 1 diabetes. Type 2 diabetes is a condition where the patient produces some insulin, but either it's too little for the demands or the body has developed an insulin resistance. The pancreas has limits to it's production, so a person's size can be a factor. The organ was only designed for so many years, too, so age often is a factor. Oral pills which possess a pancreatic stimulant usually postpone or eliminate the need for insulin injection or infusion in these people (as will weight reduction among the overweight). But I have the more lethal type 1. More lethal because type one is a complete lack of insulin production. Now this group can be subdivided even further; I'll explain, and then move on. Your pancreas produces insulin, and some other fancy chemicals that allow you to survive. If you were to be impaled and it damaged that part of the pancreas (known as the Islets of Langerhan) that creates insulin, then you'd have type 1 diabetes, no matter what your age. There is gestational diabetes, which is caused by a woman's baby leaning on or kicking the pancreas. This can be temporary, resolving after birth, or it can be permanent. But some such as I appear to have a genetic component that tells our own immune system that our own pancreatic tissue is a foreign tissue. As it turns out, pancreatic tissue is the most rejected tissue among transplants. As a person who makes no insulin, my survival requires injection or infusion of insulin, constantly. And all the same, it's just avoiding the inevitable. Not that I'm giving up, mind you – it's just that living and survival can be greatly separated at times. This can be a most difficult life to lead.

I've seen every sort of method for controlling this disease, and could bore you with stories of crazy theories and whatnot, but instead, let's cut to the most modern of techniques. Currently, a blood test via a finger stick is the best way of getting current glucose data. The elusive non-invasive scanner with no blood draw simply does not exist yet. We used to study the urine, but that was idiotic as urine would have the glucose values of hours and hours, all mixed together. Today there are what's known as continuous glucose monitoring systems – far too expensive for the average person to utilize yet, but when the price comes down (which it will), this is a critical step in better control. Better control puts off or eliminates the risk of blindness, kidney failure, heart disease, and a long list of circulatory and neurological issues. Insulin pumps replace shots, and are programmable, something NO shot can achieve. Another revolutionary step in control. The old methods used insulin with efficacy curves, and you tried to match your exercise and eating patterns with the curves. This was poor control at best, and dangerous for some, such as myself, whose glucose levels seem to be sensitive, with frequent spiking. I'm currently on my third insulin pump, and removal because of insurance purposes (actually, lack thereof) cost me my right eye last time, in that my glucose levels directly affect the eye condition I have. Which brings up the next topic.

Today I face kidney failure in the near future. Any condition where the treatment centers have "end of life coordinators" is a place to avoid. Such are dialysis centers. I've developed a condition called diabetic retinopathy, where the circulation in the eye drops due to circulatory loss from sugar buildup over decades. The eye, being oxygen intensive as far as body parts go, sends out a call to the main system to create new roadways to bring in more oxygen. Enter the new veins, or neovascularization. These new veins are inherently defective, and rupture, bleeding into the vitreous humor. This is basically bleeding into the clear liquid that inflates the eye, blocking my vision with blobs of blood floating in my field of vision. The current treatment is painful, but it seems to be slowing the progress of the condition in one of my eyes, anyway. The surgeon burns a scar on the inside of my eye with a laser, all along the perimeter, destroying my peripheral vision (and some night vision properties). But scar tissue has nearly no oxygen demands, meaning that the new vein production should stop for awhile. It is NOT a permanent fix. But this is the only time I've ever let someone poke me in the eye with syringe needles while I watched! Then there's the pump. Life on the pump, vs life on multiple injections, is a breeze by comparison. You just have things like making sure that you don't snag the tubing on door handles and such – not anywhere near the problems of the past. Nonetheless, I nearly died of an insulin overdose shortly after moving to Washington State in January. It still has problems, and there are still things which we don't yet understand. For instance – one of the things that modern "smart" pumps do is decide your dosage depending upon how much insulin may still be in you from earlier activities, such as eating. The rule is that there's just one value of how long it takes to process any given dosage, when my experience shows that it's a function of the size of the dosage, and perhaps the ambient temperature as well. In time, we'll get it better.

So there it is, in brief. The struggles that accompany diabetes are many. When you see a picture of me, I appear as a (somewhat) normal person, so telethons have traditionally be failures at raising money for finding a cure. I may never know life without this. I can only hope that I'm one of the last.

John

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Religion, even as a child, has always fascinated me. But when you're a child, it seems, they don't really tell you the low-down on just what religion is, or what it's about. They're very vague, but (depending upon the religion) each has a way of defining the rules of coexistence, the matter of existence, and of self maintenance. Many also offer an explanation of a beginning, though some do not. And then, as you get older, it starts sounding complicated, and a little bit competitive, too. Theism vs atheism, monotheism vs polytheism, agnosticism vs atheism, etc. So, even though I was blessed with a decent mind, I nonetheless did what it seems 98% of the world population does - I accepted the religious package my parents offered, which was atheism. The easy way out. That's not to slam atheism, though.

My father was an inorganic chemist for the aerospace industry, and my mother was both a teacher and a registered nurse (a good thing when I developed diabetes at 4 years old). My dad was a walking calculator, encyclopedia, and so much more. An intellectual monolith. Mom, who had never done so before, rebuilt an inline 6-cylinder Jaguar engine, using nothing but hand tools and the rebuild manual, on blankets and throw rugs on our living room floor! Amazing, both of them. So as my brainiac father laid out his understanding of the world around us, as any good father does, he made it clear that religion was mythical, like the Easter bunny, but that we had science to really know what's going on. As a high-IQ kid, I aced all that school put before me, and I was a real believer in the Darwinian theorems by the time I was a late teenager. I used to love to have theological debates with the door-knockers, because with each new successful destruction of belief I had more and more confidence that I was onto the truth. After all, all shredding of other's beliefs aside, I really wanted at the truth.

Then I started to realize that evolution had problems. I'll discuss that in a moment. But first, let me say that the problems were fundamental enough to cause me to believe that either evolution needs serious rethinking, or needs to be tossed out. OK. There are a few things that made me change my faith in the Darwinian model of evolution. Things like the eye, that only works once it's complete - how does evolution explain the "design" of the eye? All during the "design" era, allegedly millions of years (I'll discuss that in another blog), nothing works. Why does it continue? And if we believe the model, then there should be a constant stream of variant fossils, not large gaps between "design" stages. Instead of seeing mostly fossils of a creature developing an appendage, as an example, we see sharp defined lines between where an animal has or has not any given feature. It should be a blur, similar to video film. A constant stream, with slow change. Too often that's not the case. And there are others. But the real clincher was when I learned of the Second Law of Thermodynamics, a law of physics. I never took physics in college, so I learn these things and others outside of school on my own time.

The Second Law of Thermodynamics states that everything in our closed system universe is in a constant state of decline, or "entropy". Spin a top, it winds down. Throw a ball, it comes to rest. Heat something up, it cools down. And along these principles, things become less complicated, not more complicated, over time. The only known exception to this law of the physical universe is when an intelligent will applies energy in direct opposition the the effects of the law. Huh? In other words, if a hurricane were to blow through an automobile junkyard, it is inconceivable, no matter how many times or chances given, that it will ever produce a working automobile. This is the effect of chaos, or randomness. But if a man (an intelligent will) were to go to work on a car in that yard (applying energy in opposition to the declining property of the law), it is quite conceivable that a working, or progressive (as opposed to regressive) car would emerge. Life evolves, apparently unguided, in a progressive manner. Life forms become more complicated. By my understanding of the physical laws of our universe, that requires an intelligent will in order to occur - a "God", or Gods. This is the basic standing of the Theist. He/she believes that something supernatural would be required for things to exist as we see them today. A monumental revelation in my life, to realize that things only evolve progressively, as life does, when an intelligent will intervenes. The atheist will believe that over millions or billions of years, such a thing could happen by random chance. I still respect that position, but I do not currently subscribe to it.

This is a small sampling; my road to where I sit today is more complicated than merely this. But I wanted to present the scientific logic behind the theistic point of view, as Gods are often thought of as purely mythical and utterly impossible, when in fact they're scientifically "more likely than not". imho. Comment away; I enjoy feedback. I'll address the respectful ones, opposing me or otherwise. I've changed my mind before - challenge me! And until next time, be well. Come back for more.

John

Friday, July 10, 2009

Hey, people. I'm a blogger from another site, who's tired of drama and issues among users interfering with the blogging. I would like to introduce myself, and then begin the process of exploring absolutely everything there is to see and talk about. Ready? Let's go - time's a wasting!

OK. I'm a 44 year old man from the western shores of the Pacific north-west. I relocated here from Southern California this past January, and LOVE it here. And as time will reveal, you'll begin to see that I'm a strange individual. But peeling back the layers will be half the fun, agreed? Ah, but I digress. I was diagnosed with type 1 (juvenile) diabetes back in 1969, when I was but 4 years old. Today the condition is managed far better, but in those days the methods are pretty crude and ineffective. We did what we could, but now there is no excuse for what has happened to me. After forty years the disease has had a progressive toll upon me - I'm basically blind in my right eye from something called diabetic retinopathy", or bleeding in the eye from something called neovascularization, or new vein growth. What happens is that as the circulation in the eye drops off from excessive blood sugar levels over a lifetime, the eye screams out a need for more oxygen. The body's response is new veins - but alas, they are always defective, and rupture in little to no time at all, bleeding into the vitreous fluid (the liquid that keeps the eye inflated and the retina pressed against the rear eye wall). I've been going through horrific surgeries to try and save both eyes; it seems to be working for the left eye, but the right eye seems destined for failure. I may never have 3D vision again, and boy do I miss it already.

There are many blessings in my life, but health isn't one of them. I am a believer in Jesus Christ, but before any assumptions are formed, get to know me - I doubt that you've met anyone with my views. Try me, talk to me, but don't assume about me. You'll often feel embarrassed; it happens all too often. But God blessed me with a adequate mind, to say the least. I completed my schooling far earlier than many, and worked in an industrial computing and robotics field for decades. I was removed from work for medical reasons. I am an avid musician, though lately my hands are in such pain as to all but stop my playing (I have bilateral carpal tunnel syndrome, and bilateral cubital tunnel syndrome). My mind exceeds, but my body languishes.

I am VERY open minded, as conceited as that may sound. It is simply true - I can easily debate either side of most issues, and respect those of differing positions. As an example, though I believe in God, I was an atheist for 23 years of my life - I changed my mind (something I can still do, with the proper evidences), but still respect those who are atheist, for I shared that mindset at one time as well. And there is nothing conclusive to show that I'm right, either. I do not require a background belief in your theology in order to respect your opinion, however. Over the years I've really learned to be compassionate of others' thinking, though as with all things, I can still learn more. That's the goal of being here - not to teach you (though I may), but to learn from you. You will convince me with facts and logical conclusions, not by insulting me and my current belief system. I live by these words, best that I can.

I was a registered republican for more than 20 years, but left the party over the way it's representatives were behaving - not because I don't believe in some of the conservative positions (but not all). Today, I am a strange mix of both parties, as many others are as well. My desire is to see a VIABLE third party, to prevent bulldozing in the house and senate. Two parties battle strategy is simplistic: we have more votes, so we don't listen to the other side. Three parties would require compromising between parties in order to move things forward. Assuming three viable parties, with relatively equal representation. But as always, I'm open to different ideas, especially the "out-of-the-box" thinking.

That's it - just a tease! You'll learn more, if I'm interesting enough to pull you to the side for a chat. We'll see what happens.

John